Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
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Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize