I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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