gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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