never play flip cup with pint glasses
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Randomize