Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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