I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
