Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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