Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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