never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
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He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
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