VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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