Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
