ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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