No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize