White coat. Heels.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Randomize
