Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.

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(217): View more from Illinois

he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs

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(616): View more from Michigan

I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(337): View more from Louisiana

Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.

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(208): View more from Idaho

Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.

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(703): View more from Virginia

I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies

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(623): View more from Arizona

You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.

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