that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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