That's when you crack a 10am beer
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
