He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
