it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
