Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
