hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Its about making memories worth repressing
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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