In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize