just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
