should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize