just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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