Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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