Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
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