the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
