FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
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