i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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