Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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