I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
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