I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize