you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
