We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
And then the night went full on bisexual.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
