After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
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