you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
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That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
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Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic