She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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