Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
