Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...

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(832): Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it... http://tfl.nu/2lrl

Replies (9) Good night (709) Bad night (3803)
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(813): View more from Florida

he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"

(305): View more from Florida

does that mean he doesn't last long?

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(813): he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon" (305): does that mean he doesn't last long? http://tfl.nu/k8bo

Replies (10) Good night (936) Bad night (3757)
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(445): View more from Pennsylvania

We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off

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(445): We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off http://tfl.nu/9bxu

Replies (53) Good night (15826) Bad night (1055)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

we're making bets on your personal life

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(603): we're making bets on your personal life http://tfl.nu/b50k

Replies (14) Good night (4191) Bad night (1273)
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(678): View more from Georgia

I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.

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(678): I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous. http://tfl.nu/5xat

Replies (8) Good night (1508) Bad night (3742)
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(703): View more from Virginia

Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day

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(703): Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day http://tfl.nu/hrk3

Replies (8) Good night (9991) Bad night (1055)
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(818): View more from California

Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO

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(818): Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO http://tfl.nu/je4r

Replies (7) Good night (1208) Bad night (3376)
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(678): View more from Georgia

we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.

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(678): we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole. http://tfl.nu/qa53

Replies (9) Good night (2729) Bad night (1074)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".

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(603): Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight". http://tfl.nu/suji

Replies (5) Good night (4292) Bad night (1391)
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(213): View more from California

there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.

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(213): there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina. http://tfl.nu/2p84

Replies (11) Good night (2756) Bad night (1080)
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(248): View more from Michigan

Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?

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(248): Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date? http://tfl.nu/49q5

Replies (14) Good night (2638) Bad night (969)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.

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(505): We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon. http://tfl.nu/nv69

Replies (15) Good night (1863) Bad night (573)
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(770): View more from Georgia

He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.

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(770): He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican. http://tfl.nu/lruh

Replies (21) Good night (1255) Bad night (621)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.

(1-918): View more from Oklahoma

Basically.

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(918): Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god. (1-918): Basically. http://tfl.nu/nlil

Replies (8) Good night (3004) Bad night (596)
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(330): View more from Ohio

apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.

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(330): apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast. http://tfl.nu/hvsr

Replies (5) Good night (1029) Bad night (400)

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