There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize