Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.

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  (703): I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians. http://tfl.nu/fsi0
  Replies (8) Good night (1653) Bad night (363) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.

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  (604): I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary. http://tfl.nu/udpd
  Replies (7) Good night (3661) Bad night (458) Order T-Shirt
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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.

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  (859): Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time. http://tfl.nu/xhpk
  Replies (45) Good night (767) Bad night (2264) Order T-Shirt
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face

  (1-334): View more from Alabama

  so you're single again?

  (334): View more from Alabama

  yea but it was worth it

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  (334): i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face (1-334): so you're single again? (334): yea but it was worth it http://tfl.nu/2tzr
  Replies (46) Good night (4861) Bad night (919)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough

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  (781): i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough http://tfl.nu/ltrw
  Replies (15) Good night (3561) Bad night (906) Order T-Shirt
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.

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  (586): apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that. http://tfl.nu/dpbh
  Replies (13) Good night (7513) Bad night (890) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics

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  (513): i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics http://tfl.nu/sgxc
  Replies (9) Good night (4090) Bad night (936) Order T-Shirt
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...

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  (828): You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on... http://tfl.nu/x8fm
  Replies (7) Good night (2440) Bad night (812) Order T-Shirt
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  (831): View more from California

  She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs

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  (831): She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs http://tfl.nu/k6rx
  Replies (7) Good night (2940) Bad night (1002) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.

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  (847): He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited. http://tfl.nu/2tlf
  Replies (20) Good night (6619) Bad night (696) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree

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  (401): i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree http://tfl.nu/su4s
  Replies (3) Good night (1869) Bad night (722) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!

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  (303): Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?! http://tfl.nu/om37
  Replies (23) Good night (2633) Bad night (612) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.

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  (240): This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room. http://tfl.nu/ruma
  Replies (4) Good night (1223) Bad night (411) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????

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  (978): Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right?????? http://tfl.nu/gecs
  Replies (12) Good night (859) Bad night (1600) Order T-Shirt
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  (772): View more from Florida

  we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life

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  (772): we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life http://tfl.nu/tfqf
  Replies (15) Good night (870) Bad night (283) Order T-Shirt

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