You don't have asthma, your pregnant
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I wish life had little blips of pornography
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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