just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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