There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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