her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Randomize
