she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
