My pussy is not your playground.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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