You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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