Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
so much tequila, so little girl.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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